In the Shadow of Arabella Read online

  It was, however, no part of her plan to argue with him, so she held her peace and walked with him to the shade of the arbor. There was a bench and he motioned her to it. He laid the roses he carried on the seat beside her and stood gazing down at her, a look of mild interest on his face.

  Katherine drew a long breath and then raised her eyes to his. She had practiced this speech well and she continued without faltering. “When last we spoke, you asked me a question I did not fully answer. I should like to state plainly that the child I carry is yours. There has never been any question of that, regardless of what Sir Humphrey said or what you may believe. It is true I was once in love with Lord Parnaby and hoped to wed him, but we were not … we never … there is no possibility this child could be his.”

  She watched his expression carefully throughout this speech and saw nothing that would give her hope. His face was set in rigid uncompromising lines, his eyes skeptical, cynical. “If you have brought me here to tell me this, Katherine, you have wasted your time.”

  ‘‘You are very hard,” she said, struggling to keep the tears from her eyes, finding it difficult to believe this was the same man who had held her—loved her—such a short time ago.

  “What do you expect, madam?” he asked harshly. “You marry me off a list, choosing me as you would a ripe melon at market. You deceive me about your family, lie about your motives in traveling to Lincolnshire, rendezvous there with your lover, and then expect me to believe your child is mine? I am willing to concede it could be mine, for I remember well the nights we spent together … But more than that, I cannot believe.”

  “Then I think it would be best for everyone if Serena and I were to leave Rudley Court.”

  “Leave? And go where?”

  “Anywhere. A small village, a cottage, preferably far away from here.”

  “And what would you do in this cottage?”

  “Live … with Serena … and my child.”

  “And what exactly do you think people will have to say when the Countess of Rudley goes off with her sister to live in a little cottage in the middle of nowhere?”

  “I do not care what they say. Why should it matter?”

  “You may believe I care what they say,” he responded frostily. “Do you think I wish to broadcast to the world that my wife has been unfaithful? That she is to bear another man’s child?”

  Coolly, in a carefully expressionless voice, she said, “I want you to divorce me, Ned. I know it is expensive, but I truly think it is the only answer.”

  “Divorce you? Expensive? Do you think I would count the cost? Shall I divorce you on the grounds of adultery? The fact that this shame shall become public knowledge does not concern you? You would be shunned by everyone. Received nowhere. Serena’s chances of establishing herself would be destroyed.”

  He turned and walked several paces away. When he spoke again, his voice was softer, more controlled. “Divorce is not an option. There has never been a divorce in this family and there never will be. You will continue to live in this house as befits your station. You will continue to be my wife so long as one or the other of us lives.’’

  “And you will continue to stay away,” she returned bitterly. “Will not people talk about that?”

  “I will be here from time to time. But it is a large estate; we need not see much of each other.”

  She bit her lip as tears suddenly welled up and spilled down her cheeks. “Oh, Ned, please let me go. This is your home, not mine. I cannot bear to stay where I am not wanted.”

  There was a great deal of pain in her voice and he recognized with regret that during the weeks of his absence she had suffered much. He was discovering he had no wish to hurt her, for in some unfathomable way he felt her pain as keenly as his own.

  “You have no choice, Katherine. Nor do I,” he said. “I think it would be best if I leave now. Such meetings between us serve no useful purpose.”

  Another uneasy silence followed and finally Rudley spoke again. “Is there any other way I can serve you while I am here?”

  Once more she was struck by his solicitude, which this time seemed sincere, but she replied in the negative.

  “Then I must go,” he said. “Please convey my compliments to Miss Harrington, your sister, and my brother and tell them I was sorry to have missed them. Good-bye, Katherine.”

  She managed a half-whispered good-bye before he turned and strode off in the direction of the stables. Katherine stayed where he had left her and twenty minutes later saw his curricle and team of chestnuts come from the stables and disappear from sight as they passed before the house and down the drive.

  Rudley’s drive back to London was accompanied by considerable confusion of mind. Since he believed Katherine had married him to screen her relationship with Parnaby, he was at a loss to understand why she would suggest that he divorce her. If she had married him for the wealth and security he could offer, why would she now be willing to trade it all for a humble, remote home that she would share with her sister and her child?

  He could clearly remember Arabella’s comments concerning the disposition of her offspring. “I find the thought of bearing a child disgusting,” she had said. “I will get fat and ugly, and then there is the appalling pain of the labor itself. I only hope, my dear Edward, that after all my suffering I can manage at least to produce a boy. That would almost make the whole ordeal worthwhile. The very idea of another man’s child as heir to all you possess is diverting in the extreme.” He could have willingly strangled her that day, and he did achieve a small victory when she bore a girl and not the boy she had wished for.

  The day Rudley had left Katherine he had equated her behavior with Arabella’s, and in that he now knew he had wronged her. It was obvious after their interview today that she had no intention of using her child as a weapon against him.

  His chestnuts made good time to Woking, and he had them taken out there with instructions for them to be returned to Rudley Court the following day. He had a new team put to immediately and pushed on, eager to arrive in town before nightfall.

  *

  Chapter 18

  Two days afterRudley’s visit, in the morning, Oliver offered to take the children fishing at the lake.

  “I am afraid I have not had much experience with fishing,” Charity said doubtfully.

  “You need not worry about the worms,” Pamela said encouragingly. “Uncle Oliver will put them on for you. He does for me.”

  “Girls!” Nicholas said with disgust.

  “Worms?” Charity asked tentatively.

  “Yes, Charity,” Katherine said. “Earthworms. They are used for bait. You cannot honestly expect a trout to sacrifice itself on an empty hook just to satisfy your sensibilities.”

  “Must we go fishing?”

  “Honest, Miss Charity,” Nicholas chimed in, “it is the greatest fun. You will like it; I know you will. I can show you how to keep the fish from wiggling while you take it from the hook.”

  Oliver to this point had said nothing, and at that moment one of the footmen appeared bearing the fishing gear. Oliver took it from him and headed for the door. “You children go with Lady Rudley and Miss Serena and choose a good spot to fish. Miss Charity and I are going to go dig some worms.”

  He was making every effort to maintain his composure, but the expression of profound horror on Charity’s face was too much for him. He and Katherine burst into laughter simultaneously.

  “You may both laugh at me all you like,” Charity said. “You have succeeded between you in teaching me to be a better rider, but I promise you there is absolutely nothing either of you can say or do that will prevail upon me to dig worms!’’ With this bold pronouncement she moved off in the wake of the children to choose, as Oliver had put it, a good spot.

  As Nicholas had predicted, Charity did enjoy the fishing and even managed to catch one fish big enough to eat. But Oliver noticed that what she enjoyed most was throwing the small fish back. Serena caught a huge trout and
promptly apologized to Oliver for making his largest catch look so small.

  Katherine glanced up at the sound of hoofbeats across the lake and was surprised to see two mounted, liveried grooms leading a third horse. They were advancing at a steady trot down the drive. She rose to her feet. “I think I had best go back to the house to see who has arrived.”

  Oliver rose with her as Charity said, “You two go ahead. Serena and I will stay with the children.”

  As the riders drew closer, Katherine recognized Lord Gilborough’s livery. Then to her astonishment she realized the horse being led was Lady Halfmile. Oliver greeted Lord Gilborough’s head groom warmly. “Hallo, Wanderman. It’s been a long time. What brings you to Rudley Court?”

  “Good day to you, Lady Rudley, Mr. Seaton. Lord Gilborough has sent me to deliver this brood mare, Lady Halfmile.”

  “Deliver her?” Katherine asked in surprise.

  “So this is the famous Lady Halfmile?” Oliver eyed the mare appreciatively. “I have never seen her before, but I can see that Rudley did not exaggerate her charms.”

  “No, sir, she be a fine mare. None better in my book.”

  “What do you mean, you came to deliver her?” Katherine repeated her question.

  “Why, just that, m’lady. Got the papers pertainin’ to her here in my pocket, to be given to Mr. Seaton or Mr. Kendall, and a note for you especial.”

  “Do you mean to say Rudley has actually bought this horse?” Oliver asked.

  “Yes, sir, day afore yesterday.”

  “The day before yesterday!” Katherine exclaimed. Then remembering her manners, she continued, “Please, Wanderman, you and your companion must take your horses down to the stables and then come back to the house and see Mrs. Simpson. I am sure you could use some refreshment after your long ride. You may leave the mare with us.”

  “Why, thank you kindly, m’lady. It’s a bit of a warm day. Best o’ luck to you with the mare.”

  Oliver took the mare’s halter rope from Wanderman as the men rode away. “I can see you know more about this than you are saying.”

  “I know only that Lord Gilborough has always refused to sell her and that once, in jest, I told Ned I would take her as a wedding present.”

  “That is it then. He has bought her for you. He said nothing about her when he was here the other day?”

  “Not a word. But he could not have bought her for me. Why should he, especially now?”

  “Why don’t you read the note Wanderman mentioned? Perhaps it will shed some light.’’ Oliver shuffled through the papers the groom had handed him. There was among them a sealed note bearing Katherine’s name in his brother’s hand. He passed it to Katherine and she opened it quickly. It contained only a few lines.

  Katherine,

  I know you will probably consider this poor timing, but I must tell you that this mare has been yours since the day you asked for her. We were waiting only to wean the foal. Please accept her with my compliments.

  Rudley

  “You are right, Oliver, she is a wedding present. Look. From this it sounds as if he purchased her some time ago.” She handed the note back to him.

  “I hate to disagree with you, Katherine, but here is the bill of sale. As you can see, it is dated only two days ago. He must have stopped at Gilborough’s the same day he visited here. Good God! Look what he gave for her. A handsome present, indeed.”

  Katherine declined this invitation to see the price of her present but said, “Your brother is generous to a fault. You must admit she is a very practical gift, however.”

  “True enough,” he agreed. “And she is much more than a gift; she is an excellent investment, for she will easily pay for herself with her produce if her offspring continue to win as they have in the past.”

  “But none of this explains why Ned should buy her now,” Katherine insisted.

  “No doubt he had a verbal agreement with Gilborough,” Oliver offered, “and the time came to put it in writing.”

  “No matter how I try, I simply cannot comprehend him,” Katherine said.

  “I daresay he is having as much trouble understanding you. But you are married, Katherine, and unless you both intend to be miserable indefinitely, sooner or later you must settle your differences.”

  He saw the glimmer of hope in her eyes as she asked, “Oh, Oliver, do you really think that will ever be possible?”

  “I think that as long as you do not give up hope, anything is possible.” He offered her his arm then, and they turned and led Lady Halfmile off to the stables.

  Later the same week as Charity and Oliver were returning from their ride, he stopped along the road to show her Weiring, the rambling stone house where his mother had lived until her marriage. “My mother was an only child, and she and my father were childhood sweethearts. Her family is all gone now. When her father died, the property passed to a cousin two or three times removed. There is no entail, and Ned has tried to buy the place from him, but he is not interested in selling.”

  As they started their horses toward home, Oliver spoke of what had been foremost in his mind since breakfast. “Katherine told me this morning that you will be leaving for Lincolnshire at the end of next week.”

  “Yes. I hope it will not be inconvenient. My parents are anxious to have me home. But I have promised Katy I will come back to her in February and stay through the lying-in.’’ She paused for a moment and then continued tentatively. “This situation in which Katy finds herself has been hard on her—too hard. It is not right that she should suffer so. I have known Katherine since she was fourteen and in all that time I have never known her to willingly hurt anyone. She is a loving and giving person, and she does not deserve such treatment from your brother.’’ She spoke passionately, and Oliver was certain that although she seldom mentioned them, her friend’s problems were never far from her mind.

  “Charity, Katherine may not have intended any harm, but you cannot deny harm has been done. I am not defending Rudley’s actions in this matter, but neither can I criticize him. How he deals with it must be left to him. It benefits no one if we choose sides or assign blame. We must help in any way we can, if and when we can, but Ned and Katherine must weather this storm themselves.”

  Charity was forced to agree with him. “I suppose you are right, and I will try to heed your advice. But it is difficult for me to see Katherine so unhappy. And it is not good for her or the child.”

  “Then you and Serena and I will have to make it our job to see that she has plenty to occupy her mind and little time to dwell on sad things.” Then, changing the subject, he asked, “What would you say to a gallop through the home wood?”

  They took off instantly, riding for some distance side by side. When the path narrowed, Oliver checked Tortuga to allow Charity to precede him.

  “No, please,” she objected, “you take the lead, for I am not sure I know the way.’’ He moved ahead and she followed several strides behind as they slowed to a canter. Oliver followed no definite path, for the trees were not thick and the wood had been cleared of all undergrowth and windfall.

  They had gone only a few hundred yards when without warning Tortuga stumbled and came down heavily. Oliver was thrown violently forward over the horse’s head and shoulders. Charity’s mare broke stride and shied away, but Charity managed to pull her up short of where the stallion had fallen. Tortuga meanwhile had scrambled to his feet and, apparently unhurt, trotted a few paces away and dropped his head to graze.

  Charity dismounted quickly, hurried to Oliver, and knelt on the ground beside him. To her dismay he was unconscious. Reaching forward with a trembling hand, she laid her fingers against his neck and breathed a sigh of relief when she felt a strong pulse beating there. She deftly loosened his neckcloth, hoping to allow him to breathe easier.

  She was undecided as to what she should do next. Should she stay, or should she leave him and go for help? Even as she asked herself these questions, she knew she could not leave him. She took
one of his hands in hers and with her fingers on the pulse of his wrist settled to wait for him to regain consciousness. A few moments later, as she reached to brush back the hair that had fallen across his forehead, his eyes fluttered open. She instantly released his hand.

  He gazed at her in bewilderment and spoke her name, and she smiled in relief as he asked, “What happened?”

  “Tortuga came down with you. Are you in any pain? Do you think you have broken anything?”

  He pulled himself into a sitting position. “I’m fine, I think. I don’t remember anything. What could have brought us down so suddenly?’’

  “I think Tortuga may have put his foot in a rabbit hole,” Charity suggested. “He—”

  “A rabbit hole!” Oliver exclaimed. “My God! Where is he? Is he all right?”

  “He is over there”—she pointed—“and yes, he appears to be fine. He certainly trotted off soundly enough.”

  “I hope you may prove to be right, for if any harm should come to that animal at my hands, Ned would most likely shoot me.”

  “Come now,” Charity argued. “It cannot be considered your fault if your horse has the misfortune to step into a rabbit hole!”

  “If not mine, then whose fault should it be?” Oliver demanded.

  “Why, the rabbit’s, of course,” she answered sensibly.

  He threw back his head, his rich, warm laugh erupting. “Charity, what am I to do with you? You are forever saying something adorable.” Impulsively, he reached forward and, taking her by the shoulders, pulled her to him and kissed her.

  Charity found herself in the uncomfortable position of having two equally strong emotions warring within her. She had been secretly hoping for weeks that Oliver would make her an offer, and she had shamefully wondered what it would be like to be held in his arms and kissed by him. She had not, however, expected the kiss to come before the proposal, and she was therefore shocked by the impropriety of the present situation.