In the Shadow of Arabella Page 6

  Hands were helping Katherine to sit upright. Along with a splitting pain in her head she fought to overcome nausea. “I need to go home,” she managed.

  “Of course you do, my dear,” Lady Brent responded. “Mr. Seaton has gone to call for the carriage. As soon as you feel you can walk—”

  Just then Oliver Seaton appeared in the doorway. “I have had the coach come to the side entrance, Miss Stillwell. You need not go out through that great crowd of people.”

  “How considerate of you, sir,” Charity said. “Do you think you can walk as far as the coach, Katy?”

  “She need not do so, Miss Harrington,” Rudley replied. “I will carry her.” With seemingly no effort he collected Katherine in his arms and followed his brother from the room, down a series of halls and corridors and eventually to a street entrance to the marquess’s mansion. The rest of the party followed quietly behind.

  Katherine’s initial impulse to protest was overruled by her weakened condition. She felt childish being carried so but had no strength to resist. She managed to mumble, “I am sorry, my lord. You must think me foolish.”

  “I think you are ill. There is no need to apologize.” When she began a reply, he said, “Please don’t speak. It is not necessary, I assure you.”

  She said nothing as he placed her carefully inside the coach beside Charity and together they tucked a carriage rug close around her. “Shall I come with you?” he asked.

  Charily smiled as she replied, “I am sure that will not be necessary, Lord Rudley. My aunt and I can help her, and we will have the footmen if we need them. Thank you. You have been most kind.’’

  Mr. Seaton took Charity’s hand briefly as he said, “Good night. We will call tomorrow to see how you go on.” He closed the door, and the carriage rolled off into the lamp-lit streets.

  As Rudley stood at the curb watching the coach disappear around a corner, Oliver asked, “Do you think it was the heat that caused her collapse?”

  “Not at all.”

  “What then?”

  “Miss Stillwell has suffered a wound to the heart, and we both know, do we not, how crippling that can be.”

  “A wound to the heart? How so?”

  Rudley draped one arm over his brother’s shoulder, turning him back toward the house. “Come, let us make our excuses and go home, then I shall tell you all about it.”

  *

  Chapter 6

  Early the following morning Charity entered Katherine’s room without knocking and approached the bed. With the curtains closed the room was dark. She whispered, “Are you awake, Katy?’’

  Katherine’s voice answered from a sofa near the windows. “I am here, Charity, and I appreciate your concern, but I would rather be alone.’’

  Charity pulled one panel of the heavy brocade aside, allowing the slanting rays of the sun to penetrate. “You have been alone long enough. We need to talk.” She moved to the couch and sat beside Katherine.

  “If Marie had known how you feel about Lord Parnaby, she would never have told you in such a way. She did not intend to hurt you.”

  “I know, and I do not blame her. What does she think? What does your aunt think?’’

  “Only that you danced too long and were overcome by the heat. I even added for good measure that you had complained of a slight headache earlier in the evening. I do not think they suspect.”

  Katherine smiled weakly and patted Charity’s hand. “You are a good friend, but you do not need to lie for me.”

  “I did not mind. It was only a tiny white lie, anyway.”

  “How did I get into the salon?”

  “Lord Rudley carried you. He was there just as you slipped from the chair. I barely realized what was happening and he had already caught you.”

  “Did people stare?”

  “There was such a press I do not think many even noticed what was happening. My aunt mumbled something about the heat to those nearby and someone directed us toward the private room.”

  “I have never fainted in my entire life. It is so humiliating.”

  “Lord Parnaby has acted with great dishonor,’’ Charity said.

  “Has he? He has done what most men facing bankruptcy would do. He has decided to marry a fortune.”

  “But, Katy, he should have told you himself. He should never have allowed you to find out in such a way. He owed you that, at least.”

  “Did he? Did he owe me? I thought about it a good deal during the night. He made no promises to me, and although he did ask me to wait for him, I suppose he has a right to change his mind.”

  “What do you intend to do now?”

  “I intend to do what I started out to do. I shall cross James off my list and continue to court the other candidates.” Her voice wavered and her eyes filled with tears. As Charity reached to envelop her friend in a consoling hug, Katherine whispered confidingly into her shoulder, “I love him, Charity, I truly love him.”

  The Earl of Rudley arrived late to the grand ball held by the Duke of Stowe to launch his youngest daughter into society. The duke’s mansion in Park Lane was bursting with over three hundred guests. The earl, dressed impeccably in strict evening attire, made his way steadily through the throng, hardly realizing he was looking for Lord Brent’s party until he noticed Miss Harrington and her aunt a little distance away. When he inquired if Miss Stillwell had accompanied them, he was informed that Katherine was indeed present but that she had gone to dance with Lord Witford. This information did little to please his lordship and a deep frown settled over his handsome face.

  Although on the wrong side of forty-five, Lord Witford was a moderately wealthy and considerably charming gentleman. During the past several weeks he had shown an inordinate interest in Miss Stillwell. Rudley had never cared for Witford and had recently discovered he cared for him even less when he appeared in company with Miss Stillwell. Yet despite his age and reputation, Witford would be considered a good catch for a modestly dowered woman.

  Rudley spent nearly half an hour circulating through the ballroom looking among the dancers for Katherine. He finally saw her coming in from the balcony on the arm of Lord Witford. He realized, almost with a sense of shock, that she must have been with the man the entire time he had been searching for her.

  He moved immediately in their direction, keeping his eyes on the pale blue of Katherine’s dress. Her gown was trimmed at the sleeves and hem in velvet ribbon of midnight blue, with the narrow skirt falling from yet another dark blue ribbon caught up under the breast. It was a lovely gown, but Rudley was not in a mood to admire it, for his brain was in sudden and somewhat surprising turmoil. None of his thoughts, however, sounded in his voice or showed in his expression as he greeted them.

  “Good evening, Miss Stillwell.” With a nod to her companion he added, “Witford.” Returning his gaze to Katherine, he asked, “May I have the honor of this dance, ma’am?”

  “Of course, my lord.” She inclined her head toward Witford, who nodded in return, then laid her hand on the earl’s arm and moved away with him toward the dancing.

  They executed the early part of the dance in silence until Katherine remarked, “You are quite late this evening, Lord Rudley.”

  “In truth, I have been here for some time, but you were, of course, engaged with Witford.” He spoke quietly but his tone was brusque and Katherine looked up in surprise as he added, “Any young lady who truly values her reputation would not spend half an hour in the company of a rake such as Witford.’’

  “Come now, my lord,” she objected. “Surely if my reputation can survive numerous hours of riding in your company, it will withstand thirty minutes of conversation on a rather crowded and well-lighted balcony with Lord Witford.”

  “Touché!”the earl replied as the steps of the dance separated them. When they came together again, Katherine found that Rudley was not ready to quit the subject. “Heed me,” he continued. “The man is no fit companion for you.”

  “I hesitate to disagree with
you, sir,” she protested, “but his lordship has done nothing improper. Quite the contrary, in fact. He has made me a most ‘proper’ offer of marriage.”

  This communication so startled the earl that he missed his step. “The devil he has!”

  “Indeed he has, my lord,” she insisted, “and for the second time in four days!”

  His frown intensified as he asked, “And have you accepted him?” The dance was ending, and now it was Rudley’s turn to draw Katherine away. As they moved away from the crowded rooms, he led her down a narrow passageway and a flight of stairs toward the conservatory. As the crowd around them thinned, he repeated his question impatiently. “Have you accepted him?”

  “No, my lord, I have not,” she replied testily.

  “Will you?”

  “I don’t know. Perhaps. At first I did not believe him to be sincere, although he assures me that he is. He is also most persistent.”

  “I believe I know why,” the earl replied. “Witford has buried two wives already and has no sons. No doubt he has perused the eligible young ladies and chosen you as the best brood mare of the lot.”

  This comment stopped Katherine in her tracks, and she turned disbelieving, angry eyes to him. “You are insulting, my lord,” she said.

  “I am truthful, Katherine,” he replied, using her Christian name, “and that I thought you, of all people, would appreciate. How can you even consider an alliance with a notorious womanizer, a man old enough to be your father? You cannot possibly think to find happiness there!”

  “My happiness is not the issue here, my lord,” she replied tartly. “Rather, it is my opportunity to have position and independence, to be able to provide a proper home for my sister. I would be foolish indeed if I did not at least consider such a chance to establish myself. Ask any of your friends here tonight,” she challenged. “You will not find one in ten who would not think me fortunate to receive such an offer.”

  “I daresay you are right,” he agreed ruefully. “But I did not think you the person to accept a man like Witford only because society in general would approve it.”

  “Nor did I ever think to do so,” she agreed, “but I am beginning to change my mind.”

  “Why?” They had been walking slowly through the narrow aisles of the conservatory. The air was humid and heavy with the combined odor of fragrant blossoms and warm earth.

  “I am learning, my lord, that people in society are more realistic than I, and that if I intend to make my way in this world I must learn to accept the facts of life.’’

  “Which are?”

  “Which are, that if a woman wishes to find security, she had best put aside all notions of love, destiny, and other such nonsense and make the best bargain she can with whatever assets she has at her disposal.”

  “Sell yourself to the highest bidder, in fact?”

  She met his eyes defiantly. “Yes. Why not? If I cannot have the life of my dreams, I can at least have the security that wealth and position offer.’’ As she finished speaking she dropped her eyes to the handkerchief she had been ruthlessly twisting between her hands. A long silence followed.

  Finally Rudley put his hand beneath her chin and lifted her face until her eyes met his once again. He spoke gently. “I cannot bear to think of you wed to Witford. You are much too young to do such a desperate thing.”

  She trembled at his touch but managed to answer him quite steadily. “I am four and twenty, my lord.”

  An indulgent smile crossed his face. “You are a babe,” he insisted. “You deserve a chance to have at least some of your dreams come true.”

  Confused by the tenderness in his voice, she turned away and without speaking again they retraced their steps to the ballroom.

  Nothing is so detrimental to a good night’s sleep as a mind that will not be quiet. Katherine lay awake long into the night, her eyes open, staring into the blackness above her, pondering questions that had no answers. More now than at any other time in her life she wished for a confidant, someone who could share her burden. She was stuck with one set of thoughts and feelings—her own—and by themselves they had no depth. She had decisions to make that would affect her future, and she found herself incapable of making them. The weight was too heavy, the answers obscure.

  Katherine believed those things she had said to Rudley: that Lord Witford’s offer was a flattering one, and that she should take what she could get in terms of security for her future and Serena’s. Yet she was not ready to give up her dreams. She did not wish to marry Witford, but she was determined to end her dependency on her stepfather. The earl was right in saying that Lord Witford was no bargain, but then neither was she. She was not well-connected; she had no particular beauty; her income was modest.

  The knowledge that she was not likely to receive a better offer had kept Katherine from refusing Witford. But neither had she accepted him. He was becoming impatient, pressuring her for an answer, while she was confused, weighing her options and finding no easy road.

  When Rudley had taken her face in his hand and called her a babe, she had denied it, yet that was exactly how she felt. She wanted more than anything to cry like a child, admit that she was confused and alone, and beg him to tell her what she should do. But she had not been able to admit it, and she could not ask for his help. She had to keep her fears and misgivings about the future to herself, just as she had to bear the pain of James’s rejection, just as she had kept inside, all these years, the anger she felt when her father had died and her mother soon followed him, leaving her alone.

  The following morning Katherine was seated before her dressing table in a close-fitting riding habit of forest green when Charity poked her head in the door. “I saw you disappear with Lord Rudley last night, Katy. Where did you go?”

  “He showed me the duke’s conservatory,” Katherine answered. “It was lovely. There were many blooms, marvelous colors. I am surprised you noticed us though,” she teased. “You seem to have eyes only for Mr. Seaton.”

  “I do admire him a great deal,” Charity admitted, “but I am not letting myself hope for too much.”

  There was so much sadness in her voice that Katherine asked, “Can it be that you have fallen in love at last? I could not be more happy for you!”

  “It may be too soon for joy, Katy. Marie says Mr. Seaton was devoted to his first wife. I do not think he is particularly eager to marry again.”

  “Then you must see to it that you change his mind,” Katherine persisted. “How wonderful it would be if you could marry the man you love! I do not know anyone who ever did that. Even my own parents’ marriage was arranged, though my mother admitted that she fell in love with my father afterward.’’

  “Well, whatever the future holds,” Charity said practically, “Mr. Seaton and I enjoy being friends. I cannot wait to see the expression on Papa’s face when he sees that I am riding. I have not written to him about it. I intend to surprise him with a demonstration.”

  As they left the room together, Katherine remembered her conversation with Rudley the previous evening and considered that it might be uncomfortable to meet him this morning. But then, she reasoned, it was quite likely he would not ride with them today.

  She was not prepared, therefore, when she and Charity descended the steps some moments later, to find that Oliver Seaton was indeed accompanied by his brother. Oliver was, as usual, at Charity’s stirrup, so Katherine accepted Rudley’s assistance in mounting. They rode through the streets in silence and entered Hyde Park by the Stanhope Gate. There were seldom many people about during these early-morning rides, for late afternoon was the fashionable time to be seen there. Most of the riders taking exercise at this hour were men, either alone or in pairs.

  The silence between them was becoming oppressive when the earl finally broke it. “I would like to apologize for my behavior last night,” he began. “I should not presume to tell you how to conduct yourself. It is, after all, none of my affair. I was merely surprised to learn that you are so ea
ger to marry.’’

  “I am not particularly eager, my lord, but the offer is tempting. I believe I am not unlike most women in wanting a husband, a home, and children. I am no longer a young girl. I cannot expect such opportunities to last forever. I am only here for the Season because the Brents were kind enough to invite me.”

  “Are you still considering Witford’s offer?”

  “Yes, my lord, I am.”

  “Will you then be pleased to consider mine as well?’’

  “Yours, my lord?”

  “I would deem it a great honor, Katherine, if you would consent to become my wife.”

  Nothing he could have said would have shocked her more. She turned to stare at him in utter astonishment and then struggled to find her voice. “You wish to marry me, my lord? I can believe you might wish to marry again, but I understood that Lady Milicent Battle was your choice for a bride.’’

  “Indeed? What makes you think that?”

  “I have heard several people speak of it.”

  “Saying precisely what?”

  “The usual things: that you make a handsome couple, that you are well suited both in rank and fortune.”

  “And what do you think, Katherine? Do you think Lady Milicent and I are well suited?”

  “I do not know her well, but yes, I suppose I do.”

  “So, as a friend, you would advise me to offer for her?”

  “If you wish to marry again, yes, I suppose I would.”

  “I am sorry to hear that my happiness is not important to you.”

  “What?” she asked, startled.

  “You know as well as I do that Lady Milicent would make me the worst possible wife,” he replied bluntly. “She talks incessantly of herself and has more pride than an entire regiment of Hussars.”

  “Well, if not Lady Milicent,” Katherine persisted, “then some other young lady. There must be any number of them, most more attractive than I, some with fortune or rank to match your own.”